THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I'm just crazy horny about you
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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