the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
