problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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