I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
A bitchslap is in order.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
