I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize