this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize