I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
