thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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