Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
