It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
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You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
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