Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
