what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
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