I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
