I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize