What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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