And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
her facebook's as public as her vagina
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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