the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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