Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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