yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I'm passing your future prison.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
