We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
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