Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Randomize
