Whod you bang
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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