We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
