Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
