we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
