There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Randomize