He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Randomize
