p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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