'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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