Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
