I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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