let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Please don't give away my fajitas
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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