some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
