I'm laying in your front yard are you home
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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