"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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