have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
