Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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