all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize