Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
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