I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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