dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
