you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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