Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
