i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
