I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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