I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
