he shaved USA in his pubs
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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