Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
