Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
