i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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