they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
